This story is an excerpt from my upcoming book “Fry Your Chickens – Seven Strategies to Get the Chickens Inside Your Head to Shut the Cluck Up – coming in March 2025.

It’s 1988. I’m in my cubicle, thinking about Beth—my coworker with the smile that melts your heart.

Suddenly, I had a Big Bold Brilliant idea: “I should ask her out.”

Cue Face the Facts Fiona, the chicken of brutal self-doubt.

“She’s out of your league! You’re a computer geek.”

Fiona wasn’t wrong. But I had a realization: I needed to analyze my life.

So, like any good geek, I built a spreadsheet.

It told me I had at most 32,867 days to live. Subtracting what I’d already spent, I was down to 23,509 ½.

That number hit me. Time to act.

I stood up, looked toward Beth’s cubicle, and marched straight over…
…to the coffee machine.

And while I was hiding out there, guess who showed up?

No one.

Did you think I was going to say Beth? Nope. There is no Big Bold Brilliant idea delivery service.

I had a choice: I could go over to her cubicle and ask her out, or I could go back to my cubicle and spend the next 23,509 ½ days surrounded by chickens—including the worst chicken of all:

REGRET.

The fear of regret moved me. I walked over, leaned against her cubicle (trying to look cool, failing miserably), and said:

“If you’re not busy Friday or Saturday…”

Fiona squawked: “She already has plans!”

“…maybe we could grab dinner.”

“Too formal!”

“Or, you know… get a bite to eat. You like to eat, right?”

“OH NO, YOU CALLED HER FAT!”

Panic set in. The walls were closing in. My escape route was blocked by my own awkwardness. This was turning into a slow-motion disaster.

Then, out of nowhere, survival instincts kicked in.

“Or maybe we could play tennis after work on Tuesday?”

Beth smiled. “Sure!”

I had a date! Face the Facts Fiona had a date—with the frying pan.

Then it hit me: I needed to buy a tennis racket.

📖 The Science: Why We Regret What We Don’t Do

A 2009 study found that missed opportunities create deeper regret than mistakes we can fix.

📌 People regret lost chances most. If they believe the door is closed forever, it lingers.

📌 The “One That Got Away” hurts more than the “One You Can Try Again.” A missed concert stings, but missing a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity? That stays with you.

📌 We rationalize small failures. If we mess up, we tell ourselves we’ll do better next time. But when we don’t even try, we’re left with nothing but what if?

I knew if I didn’t ask Beth out, the regret would last longer than rejection. And I wasn’t willing to spend 23,509½ days thinking, What if?

☎️ Accountability: Phone a Friend

It took me days to get the courage to ask Beth out. My friend Chris finally had enough:

“Phil—ask her out tomorrow or don’t call me.”

Chris had endured hours of my indecision. He had listened patiently, offered advice, and even entertained my various backup plans (most of which involved me not asking Beth out). But even a lifelong friend has limits.

That was it. No more excuses.

Having someone to hold you accountable can be the difference between action and hesitation. Whether it’s a friend, mentor, or coach, having someone push you forward makes all the difference.

🔥 The Takeaway: Take Your Shot

✅ Regret is worse than temporary embarrassment. That moment of awkwardness fades. Regret sticks around.

✅ Opportunities disappear if you wait. There are no guarantees of a second chance.

✅ Fear fades, but regret lingers. The longer you wait, the more that “what if?” takes over.

✅ The best way to silence doubt? Move forward. You don’t have to be fearless—just take action before hesitation turns into inaction.

💡 Spend time with the ones you love. And if you have any rubber chickens, at least give them a good squeak.

🐔 Go fry that chicken.